My Husband Has ADD
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My Husband Has ADD

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My Husband Has ADD and the Miraculous Discovery that Changed our Life

My husband Bob is intelligent, good looking, witty, loving and has ADD. Ouch! That last one hurt. If you know little of what living with Adult ADD can lead to, by the end of this book you will be thoroughly enlightened.

This memoir presents a detailed account of my confusion, torment and anger that started in our early years, placing the reader right in the thick of my misery, while revealing decade by decade the reality of what happened behind the closed doors of our home - with my ADD husband at the helm. Desperate determination for our family's well being quickly became a constant for me. Living with someone with ADD - you're always waiting for the other shoe to drop. You know it will, you just don't know when!

As I began writing this dreadfully difficult story, I did some serious soul searching. How could I possibly expose our most personal humiliations to the world? I aborted the project. But shortly after, in 2010, our situation became so dire - again, I no longer cared what anyone else thought. I continued on, revealing all, offering others in our circumstances an understanding of what might be affecting them, and assuring them they are not alone.

Many people, including some professionals, mistakenly dismiss this insidious devastating brain disorder as only a focusing and self-disciplining issue. In reality it is so much more. The "ADD demon" has the power to cause those afflicted, and more significantly those who live with them, a life of dispair and hardship.

While I researched and penned this journal, many people confessed to me that they or a loved one have ADD. Others wondered if they possibly have it themselves. Listening to their stories, I realized the stigma of this brain disorder was fading fast, and that there are probably many more than the estimated ten million in this country with this condition. As those affected procreate and pass on their gene, the ADD population will continue to expand beyond belief.

Since people with this disorder walk among us and look perfectly normal, it is sometimes called the "hidden handicap." ADD children grow up and become ADD adults... and that folks is when the really big problems begin. "Little kids, little problems; big kids..." well, there is no time out corner for grown-ups!

Engaging with our family and following us through the decades will evoke many strong emotions. Sometimes you will be frustrated with me, be angry at Bob, feel compassion for me, be angry at Bob, cheer at my creative solutions, and still be angry at Bob. If there is an ADD person in your life, be prepared to frequently practice the art of forgiveness.

Although I am a victim of the consequences of Bob's affliction, he is clearly a victim as well. It has prevented him from living life with ease and genuine independence. Beyond the commonly known attention deficit symptoms, this memoir exposes other appalling characteristics that few are aware of or talk about. Bob has bravely offered to be the "Poster Adult" for ADD.

Those with thoughts of a relationship or marriage to such a person should look to this account as a cautionary tale. There are various degrees of severity within this condition. They are discussed everywhere now - books, television, magazines and blogs.

It was during our second year of marriage, years before Adult ADD was recognized, that Bob's personality shifted. He developed strange ways of handling things. On multiple occasions his new demeanor and poor decisions puzzled me, leaving me overwhelmed with frustration and fury. I have since learned that this is a common scenario and a typical time frame in an ADD marriage for symptoms to surface. (The level of dopamine to the brain is elevated during the excitement of a new love, and then diminishes greatly as the normal responsibilities of life set in.)

We both unwittingly played our new roles well. For Bob, the hyper-focusing on our relationship settled down as his offensive behavior erupted. For my part, I automatically slipped into a survival mode, transforming myself (for all time) into Bob's mentor and enabler as I frantically attempted to create a normal lifestyle for us and our baby daughter.

As you gather knowledge of our intricate life story, you may wonder why I did not leave my husband. I often asked myself that same question, but truthfully the answer is quite complex and the reasons (discussed throughout the book) vary greatly. I have however always loved my husband, in spite of his confusing and outlandish
behavior.

After absorbing the realities of this educational chronicle, with descriptions of disturbing and sometimes shocking "ADD caused" situations... it will be uplifting and riveting to read about the astonishing discovery that finally, in 2011, healed Bob and brought peace and harmony into our life. Demon defeated. Indeed, we have experienced a miracle...


This volume is 146 pages.

Format - softcover - perfect binding. 5 x 8

For more information http://www.myhusbandhasadd.com

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